New Home, New Year, New Life

Well, I'm all moved in. I must say my new home is very spacious. The kid has a king size bed, he's eight years old and has a king size bed. Man, I've got like two bed rooms, a living room, small kitchen, and a full bathroom under here, its great! Oh, I should probably clarify that a bit. You see, when you look under the bed all you see is dust bunnies, grime and what ever else is stuck under there. So I can understand how some of you might get a little confused when I gloat about my posh living environment. It's kind of like a "Vortex House" tourist attraction kind of things, it's all about perception. At these places, balls roll up hill, two people of the same height stand next to each other and one looks taller than the other but they're not. All the tricks are easily explained when you're shown out right what exactly it is that you're looking at. The thing is, the average human likes things just the way they are and anything out of the norm is just ignored or it's registered in such a way as to simplify it, hence magic. So, let's just think of it like this, anybody watch Dr. Who? Under the bed is the same as the inside of the Tardis, its just a lot bigger on the inside than it is on the outside. Anyway, I've actually got some space now, brought in some furniture, got a nice flat screen with wi-fi hook up of course(cant really have cables running out from under the bed now can we). I got a good feeling about this place. The kid is great, he's got a good taste in music, likes to read so there's tons of books laying around. Since his mom works all the time he's hardly ever in here so I pretty much got free run of the room when I feel like it. My only complaint, the kids a bit of a neat freak, I mean super clean. That means nothing getting shoved under the bed, no food being left out, no trash anywhere. That means I'm gonna have to be extra careful when moving about. A dirty room is easier to hide in. I'm gonna have go shop for myself instead of left overs. Worst of all, with nothing being shoved under the bed, I'm gonna have to go out and forage to keep the cash flowing. No worries there though, I can always hit an orphanage or a foster home. Always lots of kids, it's usually fair game cause nobody wants to live in them for long. Not a lot of high end products but it'll do. Oh yeah, this kid, he's super clean himself. He doesn't go outside and get all mucked up, not a lot of friends I guess. His hand was hanging out from under the covers on my first night here. I couldn't help myself, I licked. I know, I'm trying, its not like I ate him or anything, besides, I wish I hadn't. It took forever to get that taste out of my mouth, all fresh and clean. I think he might have used some sort of scented body wash, it was like licking a bar of Irish Spring, I'm gagging just thinking about it. Anyway, all is good, got my meeting tonight and yes, I'll be relating my little set back. The kid is spending the night at his dad's house and the mom is pulling a double, so I've got some friends coming over later for game night. We're really into this role playing game called Cubicles & Computers, I've got a level 4 Accountant with a +2 File of Collating! I'm hoping he gets a promotion by the time we finish tonight!